JANGSTS2: August 2010

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

On Bus Trips & Personal Space

Rode the San Agustin bus to Tagaytay last Saturday. Wanted to have one day all to myself before the family joined me a day later. That would give me time to finish all sorts of papers with deadlines I had already missed.

I caught the trip leaving the terminal a few minutes past 10 AM. The bus seemed road-worthy and the interiors were neat and clean. The thinly-cushioned seats covered in thick plastic were comfy even if a bit narrow for my generous behind. But that wasn't much of a problem as I had 3 empty seats all to myself. I settled in for what I imagined would be a pleasant and comfortable ride. By noontime, I should be taking lunch in Tagaytay, I predicted.

From Cubao to Roxas Blvd, the ride was uneventful. After that, the colorful balloons in my unrealistic mind started to pop one by one. I had to eventually give up the luxury of the 2 seats beside me. No problem, I thought, it's just less a little over an hour to my destination anyway. Of course I didn't anticipate the horrible traffic in Imus and Dasmarinas which kept us moving in a turtle-in-a-stupor pace. Again, that would have been tolerable if the bus didn't stop for any passenger that cared to squeeze his or way inside and stand in the aisle in the now very full bus. The ordeal lasted until fresh air started to stream inside the bus as it approached Silang. By 12:35, I got off the bus terminal and boarded a low-slung tricycle (in which I practically had to kneel to get into) that took me on a bumpy ride to DAP.

Almost 3 hours after I boarded the bus, I was finally at the front desk claiming my reservation. It would take another hour before I could finally rest in the comfort of a nice, big room which I had all to myself!

Which brings me to the point of this story... This trip brought me to the realization that my definition of personal space might be different from those of many. Might the dimensions of my personal space be much bigger than others, I wondered.

Even as a child, I have always been in dread of crowds. I have never cherished being boxed in by a sea of humanity, of feeling the sweat of complete strangers, of being elbowed and stepped upon mindlessly by people. I have been upset on airplanes when the limbs of seatmates have transgressed the boundaries set by armrests. So all the more was I a little flabbergasted that I seemed to be the only one who minded that we were packed shoulder-to-shoulder and knee-to-knee in that bus.

Why was I silently protesting in my seat? Could it be due to the fact that a space normally adequate for a regular-sized Filipino woman was a bit too confining for my bigger-than-average frame and size? Or Is it because my upper middle class lifestyle has afforded me the luxury of traveling in comfort too often that I suffer when I have to travel sardine-style? Maybe both. I don't know,

In the meantime, I am imagining that sometime soon the bus companies plying the Cavite-Tagaytay-Batangas route will, in a flash of genius and inspiration, come up with Express buses to Tagaytay. They will charge much more than the P104 fare, of course, but if that means a speedier and less claustrophobic ride to my fave destination, let it be! This personal space-challenged person can dream, can't she ?

The Shifting of Light

             I was seated on one of the wooden benches on DAP taking in this beautiful sight on a just-right cool day in Tagaytay when I noticed that the light on the lawn would change from minute to minute. First, the sun was bright and intense on the ground, then suddenly the light softened, and then the colors of the trees and grass would glow again. It was like someone up there was playfully folding and unfolding a giant umbrella over the area where I was. Looking up, I noticed a flurry of clouds move from the end of the sky farthest from me towards the direction over my head. Sometimes, the clouds took a lazy pace, taking their own sweet time to traverse the distance. But when I chose to pay close attention, up there was a spread of feathery clouds that seemed to be racing to get to a finish line.

               And that was when I realized how flimsy-looking clouds can reduce the intensity of the light and heat of the sun. Even for a fleeting moment, that which signified Life seemed to have surrendered its power to the seemingly weightless combination of water and air. It was a free-form dance of nature's elements which delighted my senses at that moment and rekindled memories of Clouds in my life!

              There have been friends who have provided me shade when the Sun had almost burned holes in my heart. They have banished fears and soothed my pain, even if just for a while. They are now gone from my life but were there when it mattered.

            I guess that I too have trekked through the skies to give friends respite from the heat. It would have made me happy to stay. But clouds can only obey the wind that urges them to move on. To where they will matter.